The Battleground

I have been stuck in a battle.

Some days I am victorious and I stand atop the mountain and proclaim my victory! While other days, I quickly stumble down into the deep despairing valley. But this battles wages on. Attacks are to be expected at any moment. Even as I type this, I struggle with this battle.

The battle I am referring to is a mental battle. Literally. It feels as though my mind is a messy, disarrayed battlefield. One minute I can be singing a hymn and thinking of Him and before I know it, a worthless self-pitying thought creeps it's way in and pushes through to the forefront of my mind. It settles itself there, screaming for me to give thought and attention to it.

It mocks me.

It tells my service is unfruitful.

It nags me to answer "what's the point?"

It discourages me. Beats me down. Not in quick swift blows but slowly, steadily, methodically.

See, it's up there with all my other thoughts. It sees what I see as my weaknesses, my doubts, my flaws. It sees them labeled and targets them. Highlights them.

It's a tiring battle.

A battle that can cause one to contemplate quitting...contemplate walking away from it all...contemplate giving up on Him.

But I have been given tools and weapons to defeat this battle. I can, will and do have victory over this battle.

In Ephesians chapter 6, the Bible describes how we wrestle not against flesh and blood and equips us with our weapons of warfare. For me, I have clung to the helmet of salvation. When I feel I am losing ground in this mental battle, I cling to my salvation and the promises found in His word.

"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." 2 Timothy 1:7

That's right, I don't have anything to fear because God has already given me power, love and a sound mind. I do not have to let my mind be a battlefield. I can kick those nasty thoughts right out. And Isaiah 26:3-4 tells me how: "Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee. Trust ye in the Lord forever: for in the Lord JEHOVAH is everlasting strength."

So when I feel that battle beginning to set up in my mind, I just have to keep my mind set on Him. He will give me perfect peace. Not only does He give me perfect peace but in Him is everlasting strength. I never have to worry about growing too weary for Him.

I will not be overtaken with this battle. He will help me overcome.